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How this book came to be

I am an old man now. But even as a child I was fascinated by images of S&M, even though I didn't even know the term.


As a young man, I bought into the stereotypes associated with S&M and was ashamed of my desires, waiting years after I was married to confide my desires to my wife. But she also accepted those stereotypes and I lived my youth in frustration. It was not until the early days of the Internet that I contacted anyone who shared my kinky desires. Finally, at forty-five years of age, with my wife's blessing, I began visiting a professional Mistress, what most people call a 'Dominatrix.'


When I first went to meet her, I still expected the stereotype, a sneer and insulting demeanor. I still thought of myself as weak and defective because of my desires. Instead, I met a warm and friendly woman who accepted me as I was and let me feel good about my passions for the first time.


Over time, I became her friend as well as her client and we considered writing a book together. But for reasons not mine to share, that relationship ended. So, I wrote the book myself and then put it aside for over fifteen years, finding, in time, a new Mistress and mentor with whom I could explore the true nature of dominance and submission.


Now, with a total rewrite to reflect what I learned since then, it is published to help others find their way without shame.